No, means no!!

Hello my fellow bloggers,

I had a horrible experience with one of my male clients just before Christmas.

He came to me for a manzilian. Basically it’s the removal of all pubic hair.  Don’t cringe guys, it’s really popular! 🙂

Since I began waxing I’ve done heaps of men and they have all being really respectful. This particular man was everything but that. He was totally inappropriate and disgusting. The way he made me feel about myself and the whole situation was something no one should have to go through. As I was waxing him he kept touching me in places no one should, not without your permission first. This went on for nearly an hour. I tried to plead with him many times and asked him to stop repeatedly. It was like talking to a brick wall and was exhausting mentally.  He unnerved me so much that my hands started to shake and I struggled to get the wax off. This was purely out of stress, nothing else. Like talking to a child, I asked him if his mother ever taught him what no means? He just smirked at me and continued to harass me. I pleaded with him so many times but it was like the lights were on and no one was home. It was terrifying and I never want to feel like that again. Finally I convinced him to go and then I proceeded to put my wax trolley back against the wall. Thing was he was getting changed on the other side of the bed and I had my back to him. That’s when he grabbed me and put me into the corner of my room and kept trying to kiss me and was constantly groping me. I pleaded again for him to stop and please just go. You see he knew I was alone and no one was with me. Without going into too much detail I finally convinced him to leave. I knew walking in front of him was a risk but I didn’t know what else to do, so I just headed to my front door. That’s when he got desperate and pinned me against the bedroom door and began squeezing my breast hard and running his hands all over me whilst kissing me. I pushed him and turned my face away as much as I was able to, but he was a large man and way stronger than me. I felt sick to the stomach and new I was about to start crying. My right hand got loose from his grip and I managed to open the front door. I have a security screen and it was locked and I was so worried he would just slam the door shut, but he didn’t. I own the back block and I have neighbours just in front. At that point his eyes were flicking from one side to another, as if he was trying to work out his next move. Thankfully for me he must have worried about me screaming for help and decided to unlock the door and go. I was shaking profusely and as soon as he was out of my yard? I quickly hit the button to shut my big electric gate.

The details are too long from there to go into. What I can say is the police took a restraining order out against him on my behalf. I took some time off work and had thought of closing my business down. But, after lots of crying I’ve decided I’m not going to let one creep take away everything I’ve worked hard to get. I’m back working and a lot stronger for it. My gut told me something was wrong with him the first time I saw him and wondered if I should see him again. My problem is I’m too trusting and give people the benefit of the doubt too many times, and then I’m left sorry on many of those occasions. NOT AGAIN!! When that sixth sense tells me somethings not right?? I’m going to listen and act accordingly to my intuition. I was raped when I was 20yrs old and this brought back all those horrid memories that I had tried to bury for so long now. I’ve even blogged about the rape when I first started blogging as a way of getting it our of my head. But this shit head brought it all back and I hate him for it! I know that all sounds harsh but I’m sick of protecting the perpetrators in my life. He’s not the victim…I am!

He’s pleaded not guilty in court and has said that I had touched him inappropriately. Hearing this makes me sick that he can do what he did to me and then turn around and say this about me! I’m going to have faith in the law that they will see him for everything he is…And that’s a predator!!

I’ve gone over the scenarios of what I should have done a thousand times over and over again. What you think you would do and say in these circumstances isn’t always what your capable of doing at the time. Stress and fear take over and your left vulnerable. No, means no and stop? means Stop! As I write this I know all too well how lucky I was to not be raped by this man. Yet, he has left me feeling disgusting about myself and has taken a part of me he had no right to take.

This happened on the 20th December and it’s taken me this long to be able to talk about it and not cry. If you have ever uncounted this or much worse than this? know that you did nothing wrong and these people are just pure evil! That’s all they are, nothing more!!

I hug all of you. Paula xxx