Monthly Archives: June 2013

Happy!!

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IMG_20130627_161508_458Today I sit here and feel happy and at peace.

Days like this are priceless and I embrace them. Just as I embrace and hug you lovely people!!

We all need to feel love and be loved, so why not share that joy and tell someone today how special they are to you?

Maybe it’s your mum, dad, brother, sister, husband, wife…  Whoever is important to you, tell them! It may sound odd to just randomly come out with this stuff, especially if you’re not one to do so. But imagine how good you will make that person feel! And how good it will feel for you. Ahhh, so lovely!!

As I sit here and write I am surrounded by things I love. Now don’t laugh – a lot of those things are clowns, angels, mannequins, puppets, Disney characters, court jesters, elves… Yip, you get the message! This 45 year old woman still hasn’t grown up! I have my own very special magical room. Lol. Do we have to grow up just because we reach a certain age?? NO WAY!!!  I so can’t stop laughing! I say be happy and free from conforming!! I say rebel have fun and dance like no one is looking!

So, go and hug someone! 

Love to you all… Paula xxxx

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Boys know how to have fun

Hello Everyone! *waving* 🙂
I adore this mans spirit! 🙂 For a big guy he has some great moves! I wanted to dance with him!! Lol Thanks Perpetua for such a fun post!

I hope you’re all having a great day! Hugs to you all…Paula xxxxx

Reflections

Move over Cindy Lauper, boys know how to have fun.

 
 

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Life is Good

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Life has been really strange lately. There are so many things happening in my personal life.

I think I’m being thrown all kinds of things just to see what I have learned in life and how well I have learned to cope!

Oddly enough, I think I’ll pass this test with flying colours. Why, you ask? Because with everything I’m going through right now, a year ago I would have just wanted it to all end. In any way that meant! Now I don’t feel like that. I feel Love, hope and inspiration!  Partly due to all you lovely people out there. Yes you and you and you!! Lol  All of you that have commented on my posts or yours, have influenced my life in one way or another. We all have real lives real friends and family, but blogging is full of such a diverse range of people. It opens your mind up to all sorts of things you may never have once thought of or even bothered to look at.

Bloggers are like family… A cyber one!

I mentioned in a previous video message I did some time back about being in a room full of people and feeling lonely. Well, blogging never feels like this; there is always somebody out there and you never feel alone. The room doesn’t feel empty… It feels full!

Anytime you open your computer you are subject to beautiful things –  poemsstories, craft, cooking, therapy/motivation, information on travel destinations, mothers telling stories of raising children, photography (and more photography), philosophy/popular culture/literature, inspirational letters… So much love and hope out there! Help for people suffering a mental illness, people sharing their lives and letting us in, movie reviews, Etc Etc..  But the most important thing?  People just coming together and sharing thoughts and ideas in a non judgmental way. As a rule…  Bloggers support one another and aren’t there to pull anyone down.

The day I chose life is the day I started to live. This is all I need to remember!

Today feels really good!  🙂 

Hugs to you all and thank you!

Paula xxxx 

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Tagged!

Hello everyone!
In light of what has happened to me recently, I have decided that I would seek out this award as a bit of fun.
I’d like to thank Rohan for tagging me.

Step 1: Post the rules

Step 2: Post a photo of yourself and eleven random facts about you. 
007Me and my Grandson, Joel!

And here’s the facts!
1.
My favourite colour pen is Pink
2.
My favourite type of bread is White.
3.
My favourite brand of chocolate is Cadbury
4.
I’ve lived in 12 different houses!!
5.
My favourite clown is 6′ and named Roxanne!
6.
My favourite season is Summer.
7.
My favourite holiday location was Positano in Italy!
8.
Prior to collecting clowns, I had an extensive frog collection.
9.
I have 50 first cousins!! (My mum is one of 11 children)
10.
My favourite film is Lord of the Rings!
11.
I’ve been to Disneyland twice and want to go again!! Anyone wanna’ come!?
Step 3: Answer the questions given by the tagger (Rohan)

What’s your favorite toe?

-My big toe!
When is the last time you ate a piece of toast?
-Yesterday
Can I have a hug?
-Definitely.
How long is a piece of string?
– ,,,I,_____(^_^)____,I,,, This long!
How many roads must a man walk down before you can call him a man?
-Many
Are these questions annoying?
-No
What’s your favorite video game?
-Space Invaders
What did you have for breakfast…4 days ago?
-I didn’t eat breakfast 4 days ago! 😦
Do you live withing 15 minutes of a body of water like a river, sea or lake?
-Yes.
Have you ever smelled a dog fart?
-Yes, it stinks!
Have you ever hugged a shoe?
-Not that I am aware of…

Step 4: Create eleven new questions… 
If you had one wish what would it be? (And it can’t be money!)
If you found $1,000,000 in your bank account one morning, what would you do?
What is something you can’t live without?
What’s the first thing you do when you wake up?
Do you believe in life after death?
Have you had any near death experiences?
What’s your favourite type of wood?
If you could ask anyone from history one question, who would it be and why?
If you could go on a date with anyone famous, who would it be?
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 🙂
What is your ideal holiday?

Step 5: Tag some people!

Jeannine Vegh
Alastair
Mumsie
Valeriu
Rahul
Sylvia

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The Week Will Get Better

Hello Everyone! 🙂
I love these so much I had to reblog them.
Hope you all had a great day. Hugs and love…Paula xxx

A Mixed Bag

Just because things look down right now, does not mean that they will stay that way. Nothing bad will last forever, good comes of everything. So keep your chin up, poke a finger in the eye of the bad stuff walk on. Winston Churchill said “If you are going through hell, keep going and you will come out the other side.” The last two I nabbed from Ajay Tao.

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Frank

Flying with Frank

Hello Everyone! 

Rahul asked me to post a photo of my stepdad. At first I was reluctant to do so…
However, I changed my mind as I want to show how amazing and quirky he really was.

This shot was taken when I was 17. We were about to go out and he said, “We don’t need to drive, we can fly!”
This is an example of the fun crazy things he did… So we spread our arms and pretended to fly! 

Note the stubby shorts and beer in his hands. We were getting ready to go to a BBQ. Beer and barbecues go hand in hand in Australia, especially in a country town where we were living at the time.

Thank you to everyone for all the well wishes. 

Will get back to blogging soon.

Hugs to you all….Paula xxxx

 

 

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A man I loved

This is a post about a man I loved.
This man loved not only me, but five others too.
His love was so open and warming that there was never a moment that I doubted his love for me.
He was my step-father.

At 21 he met my mother (33) he shared her burden of us six kids like we were his own.
Whenever we were upset or lost as children, he always found a way to make us smile and laugh; he was the biggest jokester I ever knew.
He would hide behind corners and jump out at us, he would take his teeth out and pull faces at us (which as a child, may very be the funniest thing since watching Get Smart on the TV), he would crank the music up to 11 and dance and sing like there was no tomorrow.

As for football… I don’t think there was ever a greater fan of the Geelong Football Club (AFL [Australian Football League]) in those days in Western Australia, we didn’t have as large a following as we do now, so when the AFL came on the TV, you couldn’t hear a car crash in the next room. He would get up with the fans in the audience on the TV, armed with his beer stubby in hand, his Geelong football jumper on and sing the Geelong anthem, making us children all stand up to sing with him.

He would light up any room he went into with his quirky personality, he was the type of man who would religiously read the newspapers everyday as they came off the press.
He’d drive us into the city to go pick it up (This is when we were in Burrendah, a time before the Freeway existed; taking a total time of one hour to get there and back) .

I will never forget this man, he was the typical Aussie ‘bloke’ , if children were equipped at Birth to be the epitome of Australian; that is what this man was never seen without.
Thongs, Beer stubby, Blue shorts and singlet, thongs, beanie and always managed to gravitate towards a barbeque within the immediate area.
A bricklayer by trade, a husband by marriage and a father through love.

This song is for my brother, I send all my love to him; he loved him as much as I did and is currently trying to come to grips with his passing.
“He ain’t heavy, he’s my brother – The Hollies”

Frank, if you can hear: We all miss and love you dearly.
Thank you for being the best dad you could be.
Loving you now and forever, Paula.

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What Darkness Means To Me

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What darkness means to me!

So do I hide this side of me? Or do I let you in? 

I’ve decided to let you in!

To me, it’s a place to hide from myself when I can’t or don’t want to face reality. Rather than face my demons head-on I retreat into the emptiness of my brain. At times it feels safe in there; other days it’s scary and I can’t find my way out.

Crying doesn’t help because I’m not crying out loud.  Screaming doesn’t help because I’m not one to scream! I’m crouching in a corner of my mind – crying, sobbing cradling my body… Where is everyone, can’t you see me?… Can’t you hear me?…My hand is reaching, out but no one is taking it.

A lifeless black hole that feels no pain and has no feeling.

Your heart’s broken your mind no longer your own. What about your soul! What soul? Is there a god?… If so, why does he sit back and do nothing? You need to breath, but every time you come up for air something reaches up and pulls you back down. Leave me be! Just let me breathe for a second,  I can’t swallow, I’m drowning!

Where’s all the beauty gone. This can’t be happening. I’m better than this! Why do you rob me of love and happiness, haven’t you taken enough from me?

This is MY DARKNESS, one I don’t want to drag anyone into. I’m keeping my mind focused so this darkness doesn’t one day take me away…

(SIDE NOTE):

Don’t let this post bring you down! As I said, it’s a dark place, but this is what I, along with many others that suffer with a mental illness, go through.

I wrote this when I was down but didn’t publish it. I decided to share it now just to give you insight as to what happens when Depression hits someone with Bipolar. (manic-depressive)

One minute I’m flying high.. Next I crash and don’t even always know why!!!

If you are feeling like this, know it will pass and tomorrow WILL  be a better day. Force yourself out of bed… (you must do this or the bed will win along with Depression). Go for a walk and look at all the beauty that surrounds you. If it’s sunny? Close your eyes and feel the warmth of the sun on your face and feel how it energises you. Go and hug your pet. Go walk on the beach and feel the sand between your toes and listen to the waves gently crashing. Write a list of all the things that are pulling you down. No one will see them unless you show them but this will help get it our of your head. Throw it out to the universe and let it go… You don’t need it! Lastly, I embrace you and surround you with love. Be strong!

 To those that follow me, please don’t worry because I’m totally in a good place right now. *hugs to all of you*

I’m in good spirits and really am ok!!!

Remember, I’m just letting you in! I wrote this back in December 2012. Right now my mind and body are healthy.

I write this for those that live in silence as I once did. This is what no one see’s beneath the smile.

Hugs to you all…..xxx

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Uh-Oh, Guess What Day it Is! Whoo-Hoo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Morning Everyone!! 🙂
I had to reblog this Ad from Maryanne as it’s so funny! Thanks for the laughs Maryanne!! Hugs Paula xxx

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Children and Happiness

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Hello everyone!! 🙂

As a great deal of you already know, I have adult boys (21 and 28). Only the 21 year old is still at home, but is about to move out with a friend.

I found this really stressful and hard to let my baby go, but I know he will grow so much more being in the real world away from mother. Lol!

He has decided to go to uni and study accounting and finance. This makes me happy as his future possibilities will be a lot greater. Gone are the times when you could just go to the local hairdresser and start an apprenticeship or the local mechanic etc etc.. These days you need a degree to do anything! 🙂

Last weekend I babysat my nephews (11, 14). I so loved it. They are so good for me and I love having them around. Their sister, who is 6, stayed only 1 night as my mother had her for the remaining days. The younger boy and her love arguing so we split them up when babysitting!  My brother and his wife have done such a good job at raising them, they are a pleasure just to be around.

It got me thinking about how happy I was to be a mum of adult children and nana at only 45. Yip, pretty young for all that, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. I’m still young enough to get down on the floor and get down to their level. I think I’m the bigger kid anyway! LMAO  As a parent we spend so much time teaching and correcting them… And, yes – a fair amount of time yelling at them! Lol And it’s so hard to really take the time to just listen and be with them. Life gets really busy when you have children to raise, work commitments etc. But we need to find the time and by doing that you will be repaid later in life, with children that want to be with you. 🙂

As the aunty/uncle etc this is the privilege that we get, especially if your own children are grown up. I love listening to their thoughts on life and what they want to be when they grow up. I love the banter and laughter that goes on. As our kids get older you see less and less of them. Some of you are probably thinking..Yes!! Lol  but to be honest when they leave you really feel it. You certainly have more time to do the things you enjoy, but you can’t beat the laughter of children.

So go and hug the little ratbags that are driving you crazy and remember this song –

I hug you all and hope you have a great week!

Hugs Paula xxxx

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