As most of you know, I’m now a massage therapist.
When I first started researching what would be involved and how much learning there would be, I never read or saw anything that would show the health benefits it would actually bring to me!
I remember the very first massage I did. My shoulders where up high, and the tension I felt due to over concentrating on the moves I had been taught was huge!! My brain was saying to me that it was too stressful, and maybe I should learn something else? God if this was relaxing, how can I feel so stressed?? This isn’t a fun job!! Lol
I knew I had to change my thinking and learn to relax my shoulders and somehow move my body to the movements. You see this is critical in being able to sustain your working life as a therapist, otherwise you can cause an injury to yourself! Game Over so to speak. 🙂
The amount of theory I had to learn was ridiculous, and at times overwhelming. So do I throw all that away? Or, somehow find the confidence to believe in what I had been taught, and know that it’s more than likely just the negative side of me preventing me from going forward.
That’s when I told myself I’m going to forget about the muscle groups, bones in the body etc etc etc. It was time to trust in that whole conscious/unconscious part of the learning we did. And, that’s when the penny dropped and I realised I didn’t have to remember. My brain knew it all I just had to trust in myself.
Then one day it all just felt so natural and peaceful. Yay, is this what it feels like to massage someone!! My shoulders are down, I move with the movements and each move comes naturally without thinking about it. Finally!! Lol
It’s now been 9 Months and I’m loving it. I’m feeling very relaxed and at ease with myself. God, did I just say my mind is at ease?? So funny because for me personally…this is a massive hurdle to have overcome! 🙂 It even feels weird to say that I’m at peace! 🙂
Going through the ECT treatment I had 1 year ago (Shock Treatment) My ability to remember and retain things was crazy! There was no rhyme or reason to what I remembered.
Kind of like ground hog day everyday for my poor friends and family. How I learnt anything back then still amazes me. I suppose persistence beats resistance, right?
Finally, what’s this post all about?
You could say it’s about believing in yourself, and not giving up on you! Bipolar is a horrible illness but one made much worse from Ignorance. We will always have those days when everything seems just too hard. But we can also have and lead very productive and fulfilling lives too, just like the rest of our community. I say never give up on you, no matter how many others already have. If today’s too hard? Then try again tomorrow and if it’s still too hard? Try again the next day and so on and so on!!
Remember these words from the Desiderata: If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
I believe I’m very lucky to have the support, encouragement and love from my family and friends. What I appreciate the most is them not treating me any different from anyone else. You already know your different, you don’t need to be patronized. Unfortunately not everyone that suffers a mental illness has this kind of support.
Maybe you know someone who is depressed, or who is suffering a mental illness? If so, do you realise how powerful your words of support are to them? You can turn an otherwise very dark cold lonely day into one of light ,hope and sunshine.
These lyrics are so appropriate to those of you who are feeling down. If you get the time? Listen to them… and hopefully they will inspire you!
Much love and hugs to you all. Paula xxxx