Okay maybe saying that everything was going really well for me was a little premature. Not sure exactly what happened to me this weekend. Seeing the llamas again was great, but as for my mood, not so great.
My brother, sister and their partners came to the country to spend the night, and I loved that. I’m so lucky that I have such a beautiful family. Problem is me, not them! I tried to act as if nothing was wrong, but deep down I felt a heap of emotions, good and bad.
Someone else was in the room that pulled down the whole energy around me down. For whatever the reason this particular person felt completely distant from the rest of us. You would think that by now, with all my therapy, I should know not to let other peoples problems bother me, but I do. Instantly I sit there thinking about what I might have done, or said, to make that person that way. It drives my mind crazy. One minute I’ll be laughing and joking the next I feel like shouting out “what the hell’s the matter with you!”.
You feel like Doctor Jekyll and Mr Hyde. It doesn’t matter that you don’t know whats up with that person, because in your mind you’ve created a 100 different scenarios. Some relating to you, some not.
I would love to have the ability to just switch off, but I cant! Its not in my DNA 🙂
So, the next morning I went to my llamas and tried to find that peace I just blogged about. Weird I realise, but, it worked! They are just so beautiful you cant help but feel calm and rejuvenated.
I thought about it a lot today, and I’ve come to the conclusion that I have to let go of things that have nothing to do with me. That person never asked me to feel for them or confided in me as to what was bothering them. So at the end of the day it’s got nothing to do with me. I just have to ground myself when put into that sort of situation. Because if I don’t, I will be Up and Down, like a yoyo!